Maybe covering the Bush administration in Texas all these years has affected her fashion sense?

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Why is Andrea Mitchell dressed as a hooker today?

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Infamous antiwar activist Cindy Sheehan has officially kicked off her campaign to unseat House Speaker Nancy Pelosi with the opening of her campaign headquarters in San Francisco. In the spirit of the season, we have some friendly advice for her. Has she heard of Spanx? They would totally do wonders for her campaign.

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“The ‘brains’ surrounding Hillary Clinton didn’t make any friends last Friday at Condé Nast when they balked on a firm, long-standing commitment to let the candidate pose for Vogue, while the astute Julia Reed hung ten waiting to write about her and the giant fotog Annie Leibovitz had her cameras at the ready for nothing,” Liz Smith tells us today. “A source inside Hillary’s camp supposedly informed the Vogue contingent they’d decided some time ago not to honor the commitment, but Vogue wasn’t told until the last minute.”

Why the last minute dump? “Handlers for the senator decided Vogue would be ‘too elitist’ and Hillary might come off as ‘too glamorous,’” Smith says.

More strange is that Hillary already appeared in Vogue in 1998. Guess she didn’t mind appearing elite during the White House years? Also, the Hillary camp didn’t have a problem when her top aide Huma Abedin appeared glamorously in the mag earlier this year.

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Because her mom wouldn’t let her dress as a sexy referee for Halloween! Instead, little Gabby Cirenza, 11, of Alexandria is being forced to be boring old Lady Juliette. But here’s a scary fact her mom may not know: Lady Juliette’s is a full-service “discreet” NYC escort service. Trick or treat, indeed.

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Thank goodness the Nobel Peace prize isn’t awarded for familial fashion. Oh, Mrs. Gore!

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Today in media elite sightings, a tipster says that he or she caught Patrick Gavin, of Fishbowl DC and Examiner fame, huffing and puffing in an apparent attempt to slim down. From the always-anonymous tip box:

I just saw Patrick Gavin jogging through the streets of Glover Park, trying (desperately) to get in shape.

Three observations:

1. Total fashion victim. Who jogs in basketball shorts and a huge headband other than my grandfather??

2. He is VERY overweight. At least 260 pounds. Fat legs and everything.

3. I hope he made it home alive. The way he was sweating and huffing, I got a little scared for him.

Well! At least he’s trying, which is more than we can say for his attempts at gossip blogging most days. Right?

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Now, we normally don’t self-promote, but today we’ll make an exception to let you know that Big Head DC’s notorious contributing writer Mockette is back in town — and she’s apparently come into some bucks. She’s been seen out and about at the Capitol, wearing a pricey Yves Saint Laurent wool cashmere jacket combined with a chic Thomas Pink shirt and tie. You go girl!

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Attendees at this weekend’s Rock & Roll Hotel “Underwear Party” were left scratching their heads (and nether regions) when a guest showed up who looked uncannily like the Washington Post’s Robin Givhan, style writer extraordinaire. The bespectacled visitor was said to be carrying around a reporter’s notebook and was paying close attention to the labels of everyone’s undergarments. Now, we’re no expert on the diva’s panties, so you’re going to have to be the judge on this one, kids.

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