CHICAGO (AP) — A longtime Republican district fell to the Democrats Saturday when a scientist snatched former House Speaker Dennis Hastert’s congressional seat in a closely watched special election.

Democrat Bill Foster won 52 percent of the vote compared to 48 percent for Republican Jim Oberweis. With 564 of 568 precincts reporting, Foster had 50,947 votes to Oberweis’ 46,125.

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Men who wanted to grow up to be ball boys must run most cable newsrooms in the country. How else can one explain the never-ending coverage of Congressional hearings into whether Roger Clemens had steroids and HGH injected into his ass at some point in his career? The fact that so many (male) members of Congress have already spent years thinking about Clemens’ ass is bad enough, but now the media seems to think regular news viewers give a damn. If politicians can smoke marijuana and do cocaine without receiving any scrutiny nowadays, why, exactly, is this a story?

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“Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington (CREW) today sent a complaint to the Department of Justice, the U.S. Attorney for the Eastern District for Louisiana and the U.S. Attorney for the Northern District of Texas, asking for an investigation into whether Sen. Mary Landrieu (D-LA) violated federal bribery law by including a $2 million earmark for Voyager Expanded Learning in a bill a mere four days after receiving $30,000 in campaign contributions from company executives and their relatives,” according to a release from the watchdog organization. “CREW also asked the Senate Ethics Committee to investigate the matter.”

“Sen. Landrieu appears to have traded a $2 million earmark for $30,000 in campaign contributions,” Melanie Sloan, CREW’s executive director, said in a statement. “Members of Congress need to understand that trading earmarks for campaign funds is illegal — no exceptions.”

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Only 372 out of 435 Congressional House members voted in favor of a resolution this week that called for a recognition of “the importance of Christmas.” Democratic Reps. Gary Ackerman, N.Y.; Yvette Clarke, N.Y.; Diana DeGette, Colo.; Alcee Hastings, Fla.; Barbara Lee, Calif.; Jim McDermott, Wash.; Bobby Scott, Va.; Pete Stark, Calif.; and Lynn Woolsey, Calif., voted no on the measure. Similar resolutions earlier this year recognizing the Hindu holiday of Diwali and the Muslim holiday of Ramadan passed without any no votes.

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During a press conference just now, CIA Director Michael Hayden said the agency should have done a better job of informing Congress about tapes that have since been destroyed, which showed U.S. government officials interrogating terror suspects.

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Hey, wait a minute, we thought that was exactly what got those little rascals in trouble in the first place.

Related: House Pages Caught Performing Oral Sex; Two GOP Congress Members Resign From Page Board

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Republican Reps. Ginny Brown-Waite and Shelly Moore Capito have resigned from the House of Representatives board that oversees young pages after one teenage female page was caught performing oral sex on a male page as a group of other adolescent pages looked on — with one source suggesting to Big Head DC that at least one of the peeping pages was touching himself as he watched.

Brown-Waite told the Washington Post that the situation made her feel “very, very uncomfortable,” and she believes Congressional leaders have not done enough to supervise pages who come to Washington each year to learn, supposedly, about politics in action.

“I thought the Mark Foley incident was a wake-up call,” Brown-Waite told the paper. “Apparently it wasn’t.”

The oral sex incident resulted in the recent expulsions of two pages. Other pages have been caught shoplifting in recent weeks.

The House clerk’s office tonight released a statement acknowledging Brown-Waite’s resignation and welcoming “constructive criticism” and “ideas for further improvement,” but also defending current oversight of the page program.

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“A U.S. Senate aide was arrested Friday after allegedly arranging a lunchtime sexual encounter with a teenage boy, according to federal court records,” the Smoking Gun reports. “James McHaney, 28, was nabbed by FBI agents after he arranged the afternoon liaison via a ‘cooperating witness’ working with investigators.”

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“Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) has decided to keep the chamber in session over the Thanksgiving break to block President Bush from making any unsavory recess appointments while Senators are out of town,” Erin P. Billings reports in Roll Call.

“With the Thanksgiving break looming, the administration informed me that they would make several recess appointments,” Reid said in the report. “I indicated I would be willing to confirm various appointments if the administration would agree to move on Democratic appointments.”

“They would not make that commitment,” the Senate Majority Leader said.

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Congress is buzzing after a cafeteria worker in the Capitol building lost his job just days after Rep. Mark Souder (R-Ind.) exited the restaurant in a huff because his sandwich was grilled, not toasted. The Hill newspaper reports that the worker, Kennison Battle, better known as “Mohammed,” was fired this week following the Souder incident.

“It’s ridiculous,” House Administration Committee Chairman Robert Brady told the paper after the incident. “Big guys gotta bother the little guys? What the hell is the matter with them? I don’t think he deserved to get fired. … It’s a shame.”

Brady - who has jurisdiction over Capitol Hill campus issues - is now trying to get Battle his old job back.

The Hill first reported on the Souder café incident on Tuesday. Earlier this week, Souder spokesman Martin Green told the publication via e-mail: “Mr. Souder was asked for - and gave - his order three times. After around 20 minutes, he was still waiting, so he canceled the order and walked out so as to get to his next meeting on time.”

Battle is known to be well liked on Capitol Hill.

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