Big Head DC is getting unconfirmed reports regarding the position Alex Pareene cowered in on the ground after he was accosted by a young DCite with “a finger stuffed in a hoodie pocket.”
Sources close to the scene say he assumed “the surrender position on his back, throat exposed and all four limbs raised.” However, at this hour, there is some debate. Others are saying he assumed a fetal position and screamed the words, “Mom, oh mom, please help me!”
Story developing…
Related: Wonkette Boss Silent on Robbing of Alex Pareene
So he did cry for mommy? I would really like to hear his infamous mom’s feedback on this story of incredible cowardice. Please, oh please, Rob, get a statement from Mama Pareene.
“Sources close to the scene,” huh?
At least the “assumed” part is sort of right.
We love you, Joe! Please tell us your aren’t being forced to move to NYC.
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